We hope you like big fake boobies, because that’s about all Pamela Anderson brings to the table this week in 1996’s futuristic action romp Barb Wire. In the film that narrowly lost the Razzie Award for Worst Picture 1996, disenfranchised mercenary Barb “Wire” Kopetski tries to eke out a living in the embattled city of Steel Harbor. Barb’s world is one part Mad Max, one part Johnny Mnemonic, one part Casablanca and ALL camp, as the constant barrage of strip teases, overblown gun fights and sexual torture will demonstrate. Sadly, big boobs (or abs and a baby face) alone do not an action hero make, and Pam’s performance is more wooden than her male admirers’ members after the opening scene. Despite a thin plot about fighting back against a fascist US government and some interesting and hilarious supporting characters, all we really got out of this movie was boobs. Also, BOOBS, b00bs and bewbs. Great for wanking and a cheap laugh, but that’s about it. Despite such a poor performance, Pammy went on to future action star roles in VIP and the cartoon series Stripperella. While Pam may not know when to quit, neither do we, and we’ll probably cover both shows in some capacity down the road. BOOBS!
Next week we’re scraping the bottom of the memory barrel with 1992’s Feature Films for Families production, The Buttercream Gang. Lurking beneath the pornographic sounding title is the story of four small town boys whose friendship is tested when one of them moves to Chicago for a year and returns as a hardcore gangbanger. (The thug kind, not the porn star kind, or maybe not!) This movie is available in full on Youtube here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7_TRPJ4EIE Pay attention, because we’ll be having a Family Discussion following our usual review next week. The study guide is available here: http://serialkillercalendar.com/VHSWASTELAND/HIGH-RES-VHS-COVERS/THE-BUTTER-CREAM-GANG.jpg
Remember every movie we watch is available for streaming on Netflix or YouTube! [Unless we say otherwise]
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